Author's Note: Several
months ago, Carol Beecroft published a magazine
entitled, The American Crossdresser. As far as I know, she has never, as yet,
published a second issue. In that first issue, she printed a picture of two
fashionably dressed ladies standing with a young boy dressed as a girl. The
boy had a tear rolling down his cheek. Carol asked her readers to write a
short story with the picture as our inspiration. She planned to use some of
the better stories in the next issue of The American Crossdresser. This is
the story that I submitted.
At age twelve, Ronnie Long was a beautiful child with the voice of an
angel. He loved to sing but often complained to his mother that he would give
his musical talent away if he could just be big, strong and athletic like the
other boys in his neighborhood. It worried him that the other boys were out
playing football and baseball while those things held no interest for him. He
often thought that there must be something wrong with him although his mother
constantly assured him that God had given him the gift to sing and make music
and that was something that the other boys could not do. Ronnie was small for
his age with soft smooth skin and big blue eyes. His hair was not long but it
was thick with a natural curl giving him somewhat of a feminine look. When he
wore the long robes and sang solos in the church choir, many visitors mistook
him for a girl.
Ronnie had another worry. One day after choir practice he overheard the
choir director talking to his mother about his beautiful soprano voice. She
explained that since Ronnie was almost thirteen his voice would begin to
change soon and his extraordinary musical talent could be lost. Although the
training that he had would help, she could not guarantee that he would ever be
as good as he was now. His mother was devastated and ask the director if
there was anything that could be done to preserve that beautiful voice that
had delighted so many members of the church. The director, Linda Goodman,
said that there was nothing that she knew of short of gelding and that was
just not done anymore.
On the way home Ronnie was very quiet and deep in thought. He knew what
Linda had meant about his voice changing because he had noticed that some of
his friends at school were already beginning to talk with a much deeper voice
and some were even growing hair on their legs and body. Ronnie finally broke
the silence and asked his mother what was meant by gelding. His mother had
always been honest with him when difficult questions needed to be answered.
Ronnie's father had died in the Vietnam war so she felt the need to be honest
with Ronnie on all subjects. She explained to him about castration, puberty,
manhood, hormones and what changes he could soon expect to see in his body.
Ronnie asked questions like if he went ahead with castration to keep his
voice, could he be uncastrated later. She explained that once it was done it
could never be undone and that she would never allow that to be done to his
They had arrived home but had sat in the driveway talking for a long time.
Ronnie was obviously upset at the prospect of loosing his soprano voice.
Since he did not seem to be good at manly things, what would he do when he
lost his one talent. Several months earlier, an executive of a major
recording studio had attended Ronnie's church and was so impressed with
Ronnie's voice and the choir that he had ask the church choir to cut a record
with his company. Ronnie had several solos and would be featured on the album
cover. The session was scheduled for the next week. Ronnie asked his mother
what he would do if his voice changed before then but she assured him that she
didn't think it would happen that fast.
As usual, Ronnie's mother was correct. His voice remained crystal clear
and as sweet as a larks for the recording. Everyone was so proud when the
record was released. Ronnie's picture was featured on the cover along with
the rest of the choir in the background. It didn't even bother Ronnie that he
looked somewhat feminine in the picture due to the fact that the photographer
had applied a light make-up, brushed his hair to add body and he was dressed
in the long robe with the white collar. Everyone was even more excited three
weeks later when the record became a best seller. Ronnie became a little
concerned when he read some of the reviews that referred to him as the young
girl with the sweet, clear voice of a nightingale.
It was early in June when Mark Anderson, a representative of the recording
company, came to Ronnie's home to talk with him and his mother about making
another record of just Ronnie. Both were excited with the prospect of Ronnie
becoming a recording star but Mrs. Long feared that it could not last. She
explained her fears to Mr. Anderson. Ronnie would be thirteen at the end of
this month and the voice certainly would begin to change soon. Mark was well
aware of the possibilities and argued that they must not allow this to happen.
He claimed that Ronnie could easily earn millions as a singing star and
suggested that Ronnie be given female hormones to slow the process of puberty.
He even gave Mrs. Long the name of a respected doctor that would offer
treatment. If Ronnie would undergo the hormone treatments, Mark Anderson was
prepared to offer a five year contract that would guarantee a minimum of
$200,000 a year. Ronnie's mother had vowed that castration was out of the
question, but maybe this could be an acceptable alternative. They would talk
to the doctor but Mrs. Long made it clear to Mr. Anderson that they would
The next day Ronnie and his mother sat in Dr. Robbins office and listened
to his description of the advantages and any possible side affects of the
proposed treatment. Both asked many questions. Ronnie sort of liked the idea
of not developing a lot of body hair but the thought of maybe developing small
breasts scared him a little. In the end they decided to go for it. The money
was important, but mostly Ronnie wanted to continue to make beautiful music.
He had his first hormone shot that day and the contract was signed that
afternoon. The following week Ronnie made his first record album which was
quickly a success.
Ronnie made weekly visits to Dr. Robbins and continued to receive hormone
shots. As soon as the doctor was sure that Ronnie's body was accepting the
hormones without adverse side effects he injected Ronnie with a time delayed
implant that would last for at least six months. Ronnie was already beginning
to notice some change in his body the day he received the implant. His skin
was smooth, his voice was as soft and sweet as ever and he had the small, firm
breasts of a teenage girl. As the doctor slowly injected the implant into his
body he felt a thrill of pleasure knowing that he would have at least six more
months of being what he wanted to be. At that time he did not know that being
a singer was not his only desire.
After three very successful records Mark came by one day to tell Ronnie and
his mother that he had received a request for Ronnie to appear on a prime time
television show. He explained that the pay was good and it would sell a lot
of records but there was one problem -- somehow, the TV network and the
general public had assumed that Ronnie Long was a female singer. To change
that image now could very possibly damage Ronnie's career. He wanted Ronnie
to appear on television as a girl and he was willing to foot the bill for a
new wardrobe and all the training that Ronnie needed to pull it off. Mrs.
Long said no because she thought it would be unfair to her son. Ronnie,
unknown to his mother, had been intrigued with the new body that he was
developing and had wondered for some time how he would feel in more feminine
clothes. He was now almost fifteen years old and even his mother was unaware
of the changes that had taken place in Ronnie's body because he was able to
hide his shape under loose fitting clothes. He had almost completed puberty
but not in the way they had originally feared. Ronnie surprised his mother by
saying that he would appear on TV as a girl.
That was all Mark needed to hear. He hired a retired model named Kathy
Grantham who ran a charm school for girls. Her job was to mold Ronnie into an
acceptable young lady and she had only one week to work her magic. She moved
into the guest quarters of the Long's home two days later and Mrs. Long liked
her from the beginning. They became good friends right away. Kathy went
right to work. She had Ronnie remove all of his clothes except his shorts at
their first meeting so that she could take measurements. Both women were
shocked at the sight of Ronnie's body and Kathy said, "Looks like the hormones
and nature have already done most of our work for us. You poor thing -- You
should have been wearing a bra months ago." Kathy explained that starting
right now he was to think of himself as she. Every word, every gesture and
every action had to be feminine. After she completed her measurements of
Ronnie she gave a list and a credit card to Ronnie's mother and asked her if
she would mind running to the mall for a few items to get them started.
After a bath in the best smelling water Ronnie had ever smelled, Kathy had
him put on a silk robe that belonged to his mother. She sat him in front of a
mirror and began to work with his hair. His hair was fairly long but not as
long as Kathy would have liked. However it was thick and curly and she knew
that with the right cut she could make it look very cute and feminine. In a
few months she would really be able to do a lot with it.
Ronnie was in a trance. He simply sat in the chair without speaking and
watched the transformation. He loved what she had done to his hair and the
way it moved when he turned his head sent little chills through his body. The
new shape that she added to his brows made his eyes look bigger. He was so
excited that he didn't even complain when she pierced his ears and left pretty
little pearls at the end of each lobe. She said to leave the pearls in for
about a week until the ear lobe healed and then he could wear dangling
earrings which would really look good with the new hair style. Her skill with
make-up was unbelievable. When she finished, he could see no trace of the boy
that once looked back at him from his mirror. He didn't understand the
excitement he felt with the pretty girl he was becoming, but it felt natural
so he surrendered completely to Kathy's wishes. Even the act of surrender felt
good. When Kathy first began the transformation he had worried about what his
friends might think if they knew what was being done to him but after seeing
the new Ronnie he didn't even care. With all of his heart, he now wanted to
experience femininity and get to know that pretty girl in the mirror better.
Ronnie's mother returned from shopping and laid her packages on the bed.
She took one look at Ronnie and said, "Oh my god, you are beautiful. I've
always wanted a daughter and now I think that I've got one." Her reaction
only added to Ronnie's excitement.
Kathy opened the packages and laid everything out on the bed. She checked
Ronnie's body for hair and found that there was not much growth at all except
a little on his legs and under his arms. She quickly shaved that away. She
handed Ronnie a pretty pair of panties and turned away as he slipped them on.
They felt so much better than his old shorts and the laced edges sent chills
through him. As Kathy helped with the bra, she showed him how to lean forward
so that his breast could settle comfortably into the cups. The cups were full
and Ronnie's breasts took on a new prominence that even surprised him. Next
came the slip which Kathy helped pull over his head showing how to be careful
not to get make-up on the white lace. Ronnie couldn't believe the way he felt
when he saw himself in the mirror. The dress was light blue with a full skirt
and lace on the hem. The top had a sweetheart style neck with lace treatment
and puffed sleeves. Kathy zipped up the back and handed Ronnie his matching
two inch heels and pantyhose. She taught him how to put on the hose which he
found a little difficult at first but loved the feeling they gave his legs.
Ronnie stood in front of the mirror for a long time, first turning this way
and then that way. He liked what he saw and to himself said, "That is the real
me that I've been searching for. I don't care if I never see the other me
Kathy sat up her camera with the self timer and took a picture of the three
ladies, Kathy, Ronnie, and Ronnie's mother. She sent a copy of the photo to
Mark Anderson and he was delighted with how convincing Ronnie was as a girl.
She was so beautiful that he knew that there would be many more TV offers.
Looking closely at the picture he could see a slight trace of a tear on
Ronnie's cheek and he said, "Poor thing -- this must be hard on him. I hope
that he will be able to endure the masquerade for a bit longer." Little did
he know that Kathy and Ronnie were, at that very moment, out shopping with his
credit card. They spent several thousand dollars and not a single item was
anything that a male could use. He was not aware that Ronnie had just had her
nails professionally done and loved the new look. He would be surprised
months later when he would discover that Ronnie's change was permanent and
that she would never desire to return to her old male self. He would be
pleased a year later when Ronnie would become one of the top female vocalist
in the country. The tear that he had seen in that first picture had not been
a tear of sadness as he had incorrectly assumed, but one of joy, happiness and
a new beginning.